credit hives

Can you hear that? Wait, just give it a second. Take out your ear buds and be still...

It's the sound of my bank account whimpering.

There's a credit card in the other room. A robust piece of plastic that just happens to be green (other USAA members can sympathize with this ill twist of fate).

There's a certain person with a certain purchasing philosophy that I'm using as a mantra to keep my credit card out of my back pocket. I've been aware of this individual's propensity for acquiring stuff for awhile now, but I wasn't quite aware of how he procures it. That is until a recent conversation in which he tried to persuade me to go out for dinner. My immediate response was, "No, I can't afford it." To which he replied, "Uh, credit card?" while making a swipey-swipey motion. Judging from his tone of voice, I was clearly missing the simplest solution. Did I mention that this individual had just returned from a shopping trip and was sending me down the path of doom while wearing a crisp new jacket?

I confess, I have the itch. I've even gone so far as to make a list of big ticket items that I'm coveting. But my bank account is not suffering because I've broken down. No, Uncle Sam drained it of what little extra cash I usually have at the end of a given month, and a necessary flash drive replacement squeezed the last drop of lemon juice into the wound.

There will be no swipey-swipey with the little green monster.

Unless you count the green roller I've been painting with.